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This Is Not for Everyone

  I am not here seeking admiration or devotion. I am here to be — and to show others that this way of being is not scary. I write because it is my salvation from messy thoughts and overwhelming days. Writing puts my mind in order. It gives me space for self-love and for catching my breath. I cannot be here all the time. Actually, I probably could — but I do not want to. I do not want to pay the price of viral fame. I do not want to lose myself in the illusion of the world around me. I do not want to forget where it all started or lose the ground under my feet. Being able to disappear is a necessity for me. It allows me to rest, to recharge, and to stay focused and calm. I disappear from the noise. From expectations. From the pressure that tells you that if you do not constantly do more, you will lose track or fail. When I come back, I see the world more clearly. Without pink glasses. Without dark thoughts taking over. I feel grounded again. I can look at...
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A Night Out

 

night,walk,park,fun,friends,Vidin


Nobody can prepare you for how life changes after you have a baby. You know that it will be different, but the expectations versus reality hit you hard.


The village where we live did not have electricity for nearly two days, so we had to go to Vidin and sleep at my in-laws'. This gave us an opportunity that only parents of toddlers know how rare it could be – to go out in the evening! Yes, the words out and evening are in the same sentence, and yes – without the child!


We had dinner with our little boy, after that we put him to sleep and ran out of the house. Veni and I had a meeting with Roni (my friend and piano teacher) and Ivan (her boyfriend) at 9 p.m. – amazing! I was jumping in the park, feeling so free and happy! This park along the Danube River is very romantic, and at night, with all its lights, it is very attractive and magical.


We went for a walk; Roni and I were ahead, talking about everything possible, and the boys were talking about something not that interesting, in my opinion, behind us.
We went to a bar to have a drink. I had a glass of wine (to be honest, the third for my evening), and we had a great laugh. It was a lovely night, full of fun and nice company. I cannot wait to live in Vidin so we can go out more often.

 

 

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