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For the days when everything feels too much

  Some days feel like a nightmare — full of pressure and rush. On those days I feel tired, overwhelmed, chased by tasks. It feels like my head is going to explode. Everything slips through my fingers and I lose control, unable to do anything and forced to do everything at the same time. The pressure squeezes me in a deadly hug, trying to drain all my energy and leave me barely breathing on the floor. It feels like there is a fog around me and my mind tries to see through it. Everything becomes too loud, too fast, or sometimes painfully slow. Anxiety fills my body like poison. When I feel that I’m losing the present from my sight, I try to stop and breathe. I take a small moment for myself — closing my eyes, trying to find the safe space in my soul, the refuge inside my body — and I tell myself: Everything will be fine. This will pass. You are strong enough. I try to return to the present by focusing on one task, just one thing I can do right now. Finishing that one small thi...
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My Brother’s 18th Birthday Party

 

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This was the reason we dropped most of our tasks and came back to my hometown — my brother turned 18! Which, in Bulgaria, means he is officially an adult. Time flies so fast — he and my sister (almost 15) are growing up so quickly.

The birthday celebration was more like a family gathering at a restaurant. Part of his mother’s side of the family (he and I don’t share the same biological parents) came as well, including some relatives from Germany. We had an absolute blast! There were drinks, lots of laughter — it was a truly lovely experience.

I honestly can’t remember the last time I had so much fun. My glass was always full of wine, and I loved it! It was a bit noisy, but I still managed to chat with my brother, my sister, my family, and even some of my brother’s friends — who thought I was 10 years younger, which of course made me like them even more!

It was such a great night. At first, people were a bit sad that Veni and I left our little boy at home — but since he usually goes to bed around 8:00–8:30 p.m., and the party started at 7 p.m., we decided not to take him and instead enjoy the evening as a couple — with plenty of drinks and celebration.

My sister and I even had a mini photo session in the restaurant’s bathroom, which turned into a 10-minute laugh fest. We don’t see each other very often, so when we do, we just can’t stop talking. As teenagers, they both have so much going on in their lives, and emotions are running high — someone needs to help cool them down now and then.

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After the restaurant closed, we went to my brother’s apartment and had a few more drinks. From what I saw and heard, Veni had a great night too — even when we weren’t next to each other, I could hear him laughing.

I’m so happy and grateful that we got to share this moment together. I think it will stay with us as one of those special memories we’ll always look back on with a smile.


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