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The moments when you stop recognizing yourself

  One day I woke up and felt different. I could not say why — it was just a feeling living somewhere inside me. I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. It was me, a tired version, but still me. Yet something within me did not feel the same. Something had changed, and I could almost see how this other person was trying to get out and live my life. I told myself it was just a period and it would pass. I thought that once I took a break, I would return to myself again. But weeks later there was still no time to rest. And slowly, the other person began living my life. This person was nervous, anxious, and a bit mean. Unsatisfied, raising his voice, reacting with negativity. Impatient, not particularly kind, tolerating nothing and no one. Patience simply did not exist for him. I did not want him there, but I did not have the strength to fight him. The exhaustion was too big. Inside, I felt confused, disgusted, and ashamed of my actions. I felt lonely and misunders...
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We did it! We finally did it!

house,new,family,happiness


Lately, I haven’t had much time to write, but I’m stealing a few minutes for myself now so I can share some amazing news!

We did it! We finally did it! Veni and I bought a HOUSE! We are so happy and grateful. I truly believe we’ve found the right place for us. The house is so romantic and has everything we need as a family — even more than we need.

house,new,family,happiness


We had a hard time with the bank loan (the process was way too slow), but we made it! We’re so, so, sooooo happy! We’ve started cleaning it — it’s a complete mess. The house is old and was previously owned by two families. The second floor is in worse condition than the first. But we have a garage, a summer kitchen, and enough space for a lovely garden.

I’ll share all the details soon. Right now, I have a lot of work, and in our free time — which is quite limited — we go to the house to clean. It’s a huge challenge for us, but also the first… well, maybe the second big step for us as a family (I consider the first one having a child).

My OCD is under control, even with all the stress around me. I’m really glad I’ve managed to keep the intrusive thoughts away. To be honest, I simply don’t have time for them. I know from experience that they usually come when I’m calm — once the stress begins to fade. But that won’t be anything new for me. Just another small challenge in life!

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