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This Is Not for Everyone

  I am not here seeking admiration or devotion. I am here to be — and to show others that this way of being is not scary. I write because it is my salvation from messy thoughts and overwhelming days. Writing puts my mind in order. It gives me space for self-love and for catching my breath. I cannot be here all the time. Actually, I probably could — but I do not want to. I do not want to pay the price of viral fame. I do not want to lose myself in the illusion of the world around me. I do not want to forget where it all started or lose the ground under my feet. Being able to disappear is a necessity for me. It allows me to rest, to recharge, and to stay focused and calm. I disappear from the noise. From expectations. From the pressure that tells you that if you do not constantly do more, you will lose track or fail. When I come back, I see the world more clearly. Without pink glasses. Without dark thoughts taking over. I feel grounded again. I can look at...
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Less to think about

 

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In the previous post, I shared with you about our last steps to rent the apartment in which we no longer live. In this post, I would like to focus your attention to (in my opinion) the importance to think about less things at a time.

As a person who easily gets overwhelmed, also very emotional, when having too much to think about I become nervous and want to do everything right now, just to get my head clear.

Of course, it does not happen like that because usually “the things” involve other people, schedules and so on. In addition, rarely is it possible to do it alone or in a day. In such situations, writing is the best friend I could ever have. Writing down tasks, thoughts, making a schedule always helps me to reduce the stress and to unload the pressure in my head.

For this reason, finally, I am calmer because the apartment is now ready for rent and the final step is to find somebody who wants to live there. Just the thought of traveling to that apartment made me very anxious because I have to clean it every time (it is not a small one), buy food, unpack everything, put it away, after that pack to leave it. I find it too much, especially, doing it every month.

So now, that is out of my mind and when going to my home city we are staying with my mother and stress levels will be lower. Do not get me wrong, cleaning, grocery shopping, packing etc are still there, but differently. Moreover, you always have somebody extra to help you.

Not having this in my mind, I could spend more time thinking about my dreams, time to write in the blog and to do whatever I like.

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